*It’s spring fever. This is the name of the phenomenon. And when you have this fever, you want to…, you don’t quite know exactly what you want, but it makes your heart long, so badly you want it.* – Mark Twain
The month of March is the month of gifts, it is the month of the arrival of spring, it is the month of awakening to life!!!
By Oana Lis – Psychologist
- *Spring is the season of plans and projects.* – Leo Tolstoy
- *The beautiful spring is back, when nature becomes charming again and souls are reborn*. – Harriet Ann Jacobs
Do you remember the last time when you offered a gift? When was the last time you received a gift!? Why do we give gifts and since when!?….what do they mean from a psychological and emotional point of view!?…
We offer gifts to symbolically show our emotions. A gift can come out of love, affection, sympathy, to show our pure appreciation for someone, to offer our apologies, to pay tribute to someone, to strengthen our relationship with someone in particular and many other beautiful reasons.
Psychological research shows that we actually give gifts because it actually makes us happy. We are fulfilled by the smile and appreciation of the person who receives a gift from us, and this increases our well-being. Studies show that when we give gifts to others and when we volunteer for those less fortunate than ourselves, it actually does us a lot of good too, energizes us, brings us a sense of happiness and fulfillment, and can even have effect on the longevity of our lives. In a study in this sense, even the participants stated that when they give gifts, their physical pain is relieved. So, when we do good deeds, it increases the activity of a pleasure center in the brain and stimulates the production of dopamine, also known as the happy hormone.
*Life is the first gift, love is the second, and understanding is the third.* – Marge Piercy
*Beauty is the gift of God.* – Aristotle
*Give the person you love…wings to fly, roots to return to and reasons to stay.*
So, dear reader, if you want to delve deeper into this topic, I recommend reading the book *The Five Love Languages* by Gary Chapman. There you will find out that some people do not know how to express their feelings well with words and their language is to show or receive their love… through gifts. It is essential to have healthy relationships with those around us to know ourselves, to identify our own love language and that of our partner.
A person can feel loved and appreciated just by giving them a gift, no matter how small, but they essentially appreciate the dedication, the energy you put into them, seeking that gift, your time and resources for them. The gift itself is a symbol of the fact that you are in that man’s thoughts. And in order to have a healthy and fulfilling relationship with someone, the people involved need to feel appreciated. And if your partner likes to receive things, then you need to learn to give them gifts, of course at a value that you can afford at that time.
*Friendship is based on small gifts, love is based on big ones.* – Yanina Ipohorskaya
Offering gifts is a gesture that dates back a very long time, for thousands of years. Cavemen offered gifts to express their appreciation to one another, to tribal leaders, who in turn, to praise someone, might offer a gift such as a wild animal tooth, a more special stone, on which they proudly wore as necklaces.
Also, the ancient Egyptians had a tradition of giving it as gifts. Pharaohs were given various gifts on their coronation day, such as jewels, whole crops, pieces of gold.
The ancient Greeks offered gifts and well wishes on birthdays because it was believed to ward off evil spirits.
The Middle Ages was a time when offering gifts meant showing loyalty and sometimes promoting political and religious favors. Food, manuscripts were offered to those who exercised some authority in those days.
Then, after the 12th century in Europe, the tradition was formed for Saint Nicholas to offer symbolic gifts to children, and after the 19th century, the Christmas and New Year holidays had a religious dimension as well as a festive one.
Now, in the time we live in, gift vouchers are carried around, they can be used at a spa, a cosmetic shop, a beauty clinic, an experience to do something, go on a plane, etc… even at a shoe store you can get a voucher now. Personally, I think this option is great, it is prepaid by the person giving the gift, but you are also given the opportunity to choose from the respective location where it is purchased what you want to take.
Of course, in general, not only the value of the gift itself is valued, but also its meaning, the message behind it, what matters is the person from whom the gift comes and his wishes and good thoughts towards you at that moment.
Giving a gift is a way to validate the other, to show them how much we appreciate them, it’s the joy of giving joy to someone dear, of maybe helping someone in a difficult moment, the joy of giving and to receive, in the same measure.
So, let’s do a little exercise, if you close your eyes now…Who would you like to offer a gift and what!? And, of course, what would you like to receive as a gift and from whom!? This is called manifesting…manifesting your desire into the Universe.
Good luck in everything, your psychologist, Oana Lis.